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PinnedHow to Apply “No-Makeup Makeup”: A Guide for Mature WomenHow to Apply "No-Makeup" Makeup: A Guide for Mature Women 1. Gather lots of makeup. However much makeup you think it will take to achieve the no-makeup look, it will take far…www.mcsweeneys.net1 min read1 min readHow to Apply “No-Makeup Makeup”: A Guide for Mature WomenHow to Apply "No-Makeup" Makeup: A Guide for Mature Women1. Gather lots of makeup. However much makeup you think it will take to achieve the no-makeup look, it will take far…www.mcsweeneys.net----
PinnedPrayer of the Assistant Professor Going up for TenurePrayer of the Assistant Professor Going up for Tenure Please, Tenure Gods of My Institution, please find it within Yourselves to grant me tenure by looking to your own…www.mcsweeneys.netSatire1 min readSatire1 min readPrayer of the Assistant Professor Going up for TenurePrayer of the Assistant Professor Going up for TenurePlease, Tenure Gods of My Institution, please find it within Yourselves to grant me tenure by looking to your own…www.mcsweeneys.net----
PinnedJesus Christ Applies For VP of Student SuccessJesus Christ Applies for VP of Student Success To the Hiring Committee: My name is Jesus Christ, and I am applying for the posted position of Vice President of…www.mcsweeneys.net1 min read1 min readJesus Christ Applies For VP of Student SuccessJesus Christ Applies for VP of Student SuccessTo the Hiring Committee: My name is Jesus Christ, and I am applying for the posted position of Vice President of…www.mcsweeneys.net----3
PinnedOf All Your Teaching Skills, Passion is the Most ImportantOf All Your Teaching Skills, Passion Is the Most Important Dear Prospective Teacher, Are you passionate? I mean, REALLY passionate? Are you so passionate it hurts? Because here's…www.mcsweeneys.netEducation1 min readEducation1 min readOf All Your Teaching Skills, Passion is the Most ImportantOf All Your Teaching Skills, Passion Is the Most ImportantDear Prospective Teacher, Are you passionate? I mean, REALLY passionate? Are you so passionate it hurts? Because here's…www.mcsweeneys.net----1
Dec 7, 2022Due to the Teacher Shortage, Washington High School is Now Operating in Goblin ModeDue to the Teacher Shortage, Washington High School is Now Operating in Goblin Mode "'Goblin mode' - a slang term referring to 'a type of behavior which is unapologetically self-indulgent, lazy…www.mcsweeneys.netEducation1 min readEducation1 min readDue to the Teacher Shortage, Washington High School is Now Operating in Goblin ModeDue to the Teacher Shortage, Washington High School is Now Operating in Goblin Mode"'Goblin mode' - a slang term referring to 'a type of behavior which is unapologetically self-indulgent, lazy…www.mcsweeneys.net----
Published in UWGB Humor Writers·Nov 8, 2022Carlyn LoweI Eat the Flesh of Fatphobic Men Listen up, men. I know you hate women like me. I know that when I unhinge my jaw to eat an entire bagel slathered in…medium.com College Football Lives Matter A Proposal to Pass Gun Laws (But Only During Game Times)medium.com I’m the Busch Latte House Husband Who Tried to Build the Nuclear Bunker I Have to Give Myself Some Creditcarlynlowe.medium.com1 min read1 min readCarlyn LoweI Eat the Flesh of Fatphobic MenListen up, men. I know you hate women like me. I know that when I unhinge my jaw to eat an entire bagel slathered in…medium.comCollege Football Lives MatterA Proposal to Pass Gun Laws (But Only During Game Times)medium.comI’m the Busch Latte House Husband Who Tried to Build the Nuclear BunkerI Have to Give Myself Some Creditcarlynlowe.medium.com----
Published in UWGB Humor Writers·Nov 8, 2022Jadacey TeskaThings I, A White Teenage Influencer, Have Learned from Florida Man Headlines. Florida Man flashes buttocks at IHOP after impersonating a police officer to get free food. Wow, guys. Let me tell you…medium.com Why Every #NoBonesDay Should Be Regarded Nationally. “The senior pup has captivated TikTok with “no bones,” a game his owner Jonathan Graziano plays and records nearly…medium.com What It’s Like Having Pockets Faker Than My Orgasms: A Compendium. Where the fuck are my keys?medium.com1 min read1 min readJadacey TeskaThings I, A White Teenage Influencer, Have Learned from Florida Man Headlines.Florida Man flashes buttocks at IHOP after impersonating a police officer to get free food. Wow, guys. Let me tell you…medium.comWhy Every #NoBonesDay Should Be Regarded Nationally.“The senior pup has captivated TikTok with “no bones,” a game his owner Jonathan Graziano plays and records nearly…medium.comWhat It’s Like Having Pockets Faker Than My Orgasms: A Compendium.Where the fuck are my keys?medium.com----
Published in UWGB Humor Writers·Nov 8, 2022Anna PowersMy College Tour is in Derry, Maine, and I Think I Heard Carnival Music Coming from the Sewers By: Anna Powersmedium.com1 min read1 min readAnna PowersMy College Tour is in Derry, Maine, and I Think I Heard Carnival Music Coming from the SewersBy: Anna Powersmedium.com----